Islamic Sisterhood: A Precious Bond

Amatullah, Amatullah, do you hear your sister cry?

Many times we hear of our sisters in distress or or state of unease. It could be something from the dunya aspect, such as facing eviction, job loss, a health issue, a death in the family. An empty cupboard, a lack of a coat during winter, feeling overwhelmed or stressed, lonely or sad. It may be their emaan is low, their child is resisting the deen, their marriage is at a troublesome spot. It could be they are a new shahadah, who has some fear of reaching out, or a sister new to this blessed dawah who wants to learn, but doesn't want to appear jahil. It could be be anything, and we know that Allaah will test the believers.

You shall certainly be tried and tested in your wealth and properties and in your personal selves, and you shall certainly hear much that will grieve you from those who received the Scripture before you (Jews and Christians) and from those who ascribe partners to Allâh, but if you persevere patiently, and become Al-Muttaqûn (the pious - see V.2:2) then verily, that will be a determining factor in all affairs, and that is from the great matters, [which you must hold on with all your efforts]. (Aali Imran 3:186)

How many times do you say to yourself, subhna'allah, I should call that sister or at least send an email. Let me pay her a visit, drop off something to lift her spirit. Give some money, food or clohing. Share a book from my library. Invite her to a halaqah, teach her Qu'ran. Or share a smile and listen quietly.

But you don't. Maybe you forget. Maybe you get busy. Or maybe you thought, well insha'allah another sister will/has/should. But could it be everyone else thought the same as you?

And there she is, your sister..still waiting...Did you really hear her cry?
You get word, you hear and you know. But you mute out the sound.
Will your open up your ears? Your eyes? Your heart?
Will you respond to your sisters call?


SUGGESTED ACTIONS:

~ Purify your intention
Actions are by intentions....(1)

~ Make dua for your sister There is no believing servant who supplicates for his brother behind his back (in his absence) that the Angels do not say: The same be for you too. (2)

~ Give words of encouragement. Tell her to never despair of Allah's Mercy.
"The deen is sincerity..." (3)

~ Write her a letter or email with the suras or hadiths that can aid her with her situation. This is something she can re-read and gain benefit from again, insha'allah

~ Make dinner for her family

~ Care for her children, while she takes time to nuture herself or run an errand

~ Visit your sister when sick
"The rights of a Muslim upon another muslim are six...when he is ill he visits him.."(4)

~ Rush to give charity
Translation of Sahih Bukhari, Book 24: Volume 9, Book 93, Number 525y:
Narrated Abu Huraira: Allah's Apostle sallahu alayhi wa sallam said, "If somebody gives in charity something equal to a date from his honestly earned money ----for nothing ascends to Allah except good---- then Allah will take it in His Right (Hand) and bring it up for its owner as anyone of you brings up a baby horse, till it becomes like a mountain." Abu Huraira said: The Prophet. sallahu alayhi wa sallam said, "Nothing ascends to Allah except good."

~ Have a long hand
Translation of Sahih Bukhari Book 24, Number 501:
Narrated 'Aisha: Some of the wives of the Prophet asked him, "Who amongst us will be the first to follow you (i.e. die after you)?" He said, "Whoever has the longest hand." So they started measuring their hands with a stick and Sauda's hand turned out to be the longest. (When Zainab bint Jahsh died first of all in the caliphate of 'Umar), we came to know that the long hand was a symbol of practicing charity, so she was the first to follow the Prophet and she used to love to practice charity. (Sauda died later in the caliphate of Muawiya).

~ If you give her items of clothing or household goods, make sure they are clean and in good condition. This way the recipient feels good about accepting and it shows your consideration

~ Do not remind her in the future of any good deeds you may have done for her
Al-Baqarah - 2:264O you who believe! Do not render in vain your Sadaqah (charity) by reminders of your generosity or by injury, like him who spends his wealth to be seen of men, and he does not believe in Allâh, nor in the Last Day. His likeness is the likeness of a smooth rock on which is a little dust; on it falls heavy rain which leaves it bare. They are not able to do anything with what they have earned. And Allâh does not guide the disbelieving people. (Al-Baqarah 2:264)


~ Maintain her confidences

~ Remain anonymous if able (you can always just mail a money order, gift certificate for the local supermarket or store like walmart, sears ,drop a box of produce or other items on the stoop..etc)
...a man who gives in charity so secretly that his left hand does not know what his right hand has given (5)

~ Encourage others to do the same
A believer is like a brick for another believer, the one supporting the other.(6)

Insha'allah I hope I have said a good word, and that we are open to aid our sisters anyway we are able. I'm sure I have overlooked something, so would be happy to hear what you have done, or what you know others have done, when they responded to an Amatullah's cry.

With that I leave you with this final hadith:

Translation of Sahih Muslim, Book 5: Book 005, Number 2219:
Mundhir b. Jarir reported on the authority of his father: While we were in the
company of the Messenger of Allah in the early hours of the morning, some people came there (who) were barefooted, naked, wearing striped woollen clothes, or cloaks, with their swords hung (around their necks). Most of them, nay, all of them, belonged to the tribe of Mudar. The colour of the face of the Messenger of Allah underwent a change when he saw them in poverty. He then entered (his house) and came out and commanded Bilal (to pronounce Adhan). He pronounced Adhan and Iqima, and he (the Holy Prophet) observed prayer (along with his Companion) and then addressed (them reciting verses of the Holy Qur'an): '" 0 people, fear your Lord, Who created you from a single being" to the end of the verse," Allah is ever a Watcher over you" (iv. 1). (He then recited) a verse of Sura Hashr:" Fear Allah. and let every soul consider that which it sends forth for the morrow and fear Allah" (lix. 18). (Then the audience began to vie with one another in giving charity.) Some donated a dinar, others a dirham, still others clothes, some donated a sa' of wheat, some a sa' of dates; till he (the Holy Prophet) said: (Bring) even if it is half a date. Then a person from among the Ansar came there with a money bag which his hands could scarcely lift; in fact, they could not (lift). Then the people followed continuously, till I saw two heaps of eatables and clothes, and I saw the face of the Messenger (may peace be upon him) glistening, like gold (on account of joy). The Messenger of Allah said: He who sets a good precedent in Islam, there is a reward for him for this (act of goodness) and reward of that also who acted according to it subsequently, without any deduction from their rewards; and he who sets in Islam an evil precedent, there is upon him the burden of that, and the burden of him also who acted upon it subsequently, without any deduction from their burden.

Please forgive me if I have erred, and hasten to correct me if I have done so. Anything good is from Allaah azza wajeel, anything bad from myself and the accursed shaitan.
UmmIdris (Kareema)
Subhanaka 'allahumma wa bihamdika 'ash hadu 'alla 'ilaha 'illa 'anta astaghfiruka wa 'atubu 'ilayka

References
1. From Umar ibn al-Khattaab who said that Allah's Messenger sallahu alayhi wa sallam said:
Actions are by intentions and there is for every person only that which is intended so he whose migration was for Allah and His messenger, then his migration was for Allaah and His Messenger, and he whose migration was to attain some wordly goal or to take a woman in marriage, then his migration was for that which he migrated. Muslim vol #3 p. 1056 #4692
2. Abu Dharr reported that Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) said: There is no believing servant who supplicates for his brother behind his back (in his absence) that the Angels do not say: The same be for you too. Muslim Book 035, Number 6588:
3. From Tameem ad-Daaree (radiyallaahu 'anhu) who said that Allah's Messenegr sallahu alayhi wa sallam said: "The deen is sincerity. The deen is sincerity." We asked to whom O Messenger of Allaah?" He replied, To Allaah, to His Book, to His Messenger, to the leaders of the Muslims and their common folk." Muslim #55 vol 1 pg 37 #98
4. From Aboo Hurairah (radiyallaahu 'anhu) who said that Allaah's Messenger said: The rights of a Muslim upon another Muslim are six. Tehy asked, "What are they O Messenger of Allah?" He said, "When he meets him he greets him with salaam, when he invites him he responds, when he asks for his sincere advise he sincerely advises him, whjen he sneezes and prises Allaah he asks for Allaah's Mercy for him, when he is ill he visits him, and when he dies he accompanies him (i.e his funeral).
Reported by Muslim #2162 (vol 3. p 1183 no. 5379)
5. Volume 8, Book 82, Number 798:
Narrated Abu Huraira: The Prophet sallahu alayhi wa sallam said, "Seven (people) will be shaded by Allah by His Shade on the Day of Resurrection when there will be no shade except His Shade. (They will be), a just ruler, a young man who has been brought up in the worship of Allah, a man who remembers Allah in seclusion and his eyes are then flooded with tears, a man whose heart is attached to mosques (offers his compulsory congregational prayers in the mosque), two men who love each other for Allah's Sake, a man who is called by a charming lady of noble birth to commit illegal sexual intercourse with her, and he says, 'I am afraid of Allah,' and (finally), a man who gives in charity so secretly that his left hand does not know what his right hand has given."
6. Abu Musa reported Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) as saying: A believer is like a brick for another believer, the one supporting the other.
Muslim, Book 032, Number 6257:

http://www.salafisisters.org/Halaqahs.html